Just for Laughs – HASA Humor

by Thom Van Vleck

If you have read these newsletters for awhile you have heard me give my buddy Mitch Ridout no end of trouble because he has always been gifted as an athlete, but rarely seriously trains.  He has jokingly told me he is in a “recuperation” phase and has been for several years.  Every time I call, inevitably I ask Mitch if he is working out or still in his recuperation phase.   Well, recently, when I called I found out the Ol’ Mitch-meister has added a whole new dimension to his routine.  He is now in the “Visualization” Phase of his workout.  He told me he is visualizing how he will soon be working out and until he has a clear mental picture he doesn’t want to push himself beyond what he is capable.  Well……I’ve know Mitch for a loooonnnng time, and if he’s waiting for a “clear” mental picture…..we might be in for a wait for his next “phase”.  And by then, he may need to recuperate some more.

CREDIT:  The Braemar Stone Tablet, Volume #7, Issue #1

(Webmasters notes:  Well, I guess the vacation is over.  I hope everyone enjoyed these past exerpts from the Braemar Stone Tablet.   I promise that tomorrow I will get back to business as usual with the USAWA Daily News. But I gotta tell ya – there’s a lot more good stuff in the series of the Braemar Stone Tablet that I could rerun if I need a vacation again!  )

Just for Laughs – the King of Beasts Training System

by Thom Van Vleck

What do the two guys on the left and the lion on the right have in common? They both follow the King of Beasts Training System. The program's innovator Mitch Ridout is pictured on the left, and his one pupil Tedd Van Vleck is to his right.

It is my goal in life to make the King of Beasts or KOB training system as famous as the ab roller or Tony Little’s “Gazelle” fitness system.  As a matter of fact, when you think of Mitch think of Tony Little.  For those of you unfamiliar with the KOB it is based heavily on Mitch’s keen observation of the “real” KING OF BEASTS, the mighty lion.  The lion lays around all day “recuperating” (a key principle).  He only gets up for a contest (fight) and for sex (Mitch’s wife is expecting twins).  Diet is primarily very rare meat and lots of it, followed by extended slumber.

Anyhow, the KOB training tip of the month has to do with cross training.  Mitch has taken up Scotland’s “other” sport (no, not curling). Golf, yes, GOLF!  They call it a sport and I guess it is one.  Mitch likes to cross train with golf as it requires little real effort and if you have a cart it requires almost no effort at all.  Plus, it can be quite satisfying to the ego.  Afterall, Mitch could never throw the hammer or 28 a hundred yards and he can hit a golf ball almost that far….all in the air, too.  Mitch really wows them when he takes his driver three turns around like his hammer before actually hitting the ball.  Occassionally, he actually lets go of the driver and tape measures it before moving on to the bunkers. 

So the tip of the month is:  Cross training with Golf!!!  You’ll feel like the KING OF BEASTS!!! 

(Webmaster’s comment:  The KOB Training System must be catching on.  I hear another JWC member, Tedd Van Vleck, has taken it up as well, and is making an attempt at Golf.  It is also rumored that Tedd has purchased a Big Green Egg to add the meat element to the KOB program he’s on.  Don’t be discouraged Tedd, as succeeding on two out of three key parts of the KOB Program is not that bad!!!!)

CREDIT:  Braemar Stone Tablet, Volume #1, Issue #3

Just for Laughs – more funny stuff

by Thom Van Vleck

Recently, Kevin McAllister asked some of his fellow HASA athletes for their training routines.  Some of them were so important to development of the all round athlete I felt I should include them in this newsletter.

Here was Larry Ventress’ response:

Off season:  Lift like hell, throw a little bit
In season:  Lift like hell, throw a little bit more
Results:  I still stink
Post season: Depression sets in
Results:  The oreo cookies come out
Post Cookies:  Feel guilty about not training and eating too many cookies.
Results:  Lift like hell, throw a little bit and get ready for next year.

It’s a vicious cycle!  Hope this helps, Larry.

Al Myers replied:  I also “cycle” train like Larry, but mine goes like this.

Off season:  Powerlift as hard as possible to get stronger and tighten up all tendons/muscle groups
Early season:  Throw as hard as possible and loosen up all tendons/muscle groups
In season:  Pull or tear some major tendon/muscle groups.
Next year:  Start it all over again!!!

Mitch Ridout clean and pressing the Jackson Anvil. Mitch often won this "challenge event" following past HASA Highland Games. I believe his best effort was 14 reps with the 150# anvil - quite amazing! (photo courtesy of Al Myers)

Now, I will include Mitch Ridout’s “King of Beasts” Training Routine for the Highland Games.  Mitch believes strongly in the “KOB”.  It dictates a focus on recuperation.  Mitch say, “It is during the recuperation phase that muscle is actually built, the act of working out actually tears down muscle. Look at our friend, the mighty Lion, the KING OF BEASTS.  He will lay around all day getting up only to eat, have sex, or to deal with competition and he carries a mighty frame of muscle.”  Now, I can tell you….. I have watched Mitch train and he fervently believes in the KOB philosophy.  I have also had to listen to him sleep.  That guy can fall asleep before his head hits the pillow and his snoring will rattle window panes.  I also know that he follows the eating part religously, eating copious amounts of red meat in one sitting.  As for the sex part, you would have to ask his wife or Kevin McAllister as I do know Kevin invited him to “sleep” over one weekend when Kev’s wife was out of town.

COMING TOMORROW – THE DETAILS OF THE KOB TRAINING SYSTEM

CREDIT:  Braemar Stone Tablet, Volume #3, Issue #1

2011 Nationals: Meet the Loaders

by Thom Van Vleck

Mitch Ridout and Tedd Van Vleck were the loaders for the entire meet and didn't make a SINGLE MISLOAD!

Every meet I’ve been to the loaders have been thanked and rightfully so.  I’ve been a loader before and one time at a meet with about 70 lifters!  It’s hard, thankless work.  The only time anyone notices the loaders is if there’s a miss load!  And at Nationals there were none!  So these guys were barely noticed.

Often, when you look for volunteers for loading the room will empty quicker than a request for a suicide mission during Armageddon!  But I had two guys step up to save the day.  My brother, Tedd Van Vleck, and my “brother from another mother” Mitch Ridout.  Actually, Mitch rented a room from my Mom at one time and she jokingly calls him her “favorite” son (at least I think she’s joking).  Mitch has been my friend for over 20 years and anybody that can put up with me for that long deserves a trophy……especially after the work I get out of him!

Tedd and Mitch both were signed up to lift.  But I was short loaders and I asked them to step in and they took a bullet for JWC team (or maybe Team Ledaig wouldn’t have had a cake walk for the team title!…..Ok, so maybe they would have still won since they had the best lifter in both men and women’s catagories).  But that thinned the JWC ranks out considerably.  I do know that my brother said at the end of the day he wished he’d lifted instead….he thought he’d be less sore!  I also noticed that Dean Ross, who lifted in the morning session, was helping Mitch and Tedd in the afternoon.  That’s the kind of stuff that makes these meets work!

So a special thanks to Mitch and Tedd for being our loaders and allowing the lifters to focus on lifting!  We appreciate you!